Coping with Change: ADHD, Autism Spectrum Disorders, and Other “Issues”

“Our children” are often identified as being “creatures of habit”, they tend to be highly regimented and rigid in their ways of thinking and acting. Virtually any type of change in environment and routine can become a massive dilemma for all children and teens, especially “our children” with “varied needs”.

Our children will have many new experiences to encounter as the school year winds down, summer vacation begins, and then the summer winds down and the school year begins again. Many parents experience either “selective forgetting” or feelings of “dread” as our children transition through these changes year after year.

So what’s a parent to do to help their child transition through times of change? Here are some suggestions based on my decades of teaching, training, and counseling children, teens, young adults and their families with special needs:

  1. Parents can and should use “modeling and role-playing” to help their child prepare for the ending or beginning of a new routine.
  2. Parents can spend time, along with siblings “training” their child how to create new routines and especially how to have some level of flexibility in these time of transitioning.
  3. Parents can develop a clear-cut timetable for the transition so their child will know what to expect and how they will still be able to have time to do preferred tasks. Even though little occurs perfectly, knowing what to expect will bring comfort to our children.
  4. Parents typically get best results by explaining Who, What, When, Where, and How factors play into the transitioning events and activities their child will experience. How this information is presented is just as important as when and where. During times of stress and turmoil is NOT the time to discuss potential changes, wait until our child and their environment are at peace to have these discussions.
  5. Parents need to have their child be part of the decision making process to establish better buy-in.
  6. Parents who create a “reward schedule” for a relatively smooth transition are most likely to see a less traumatic transition period.
  7. Parents who understand that it will take time and work for their children to get acclimated to a new routine and that they will likely experience some struggles as they go tend to be happiest. We are looking for “progress not perfection”.
  8. Parents who keep routine as times of change occur tend to be happiest. Parents who continue with light academics and various types of therapies that the child typically experiences throughout the school year tend to have a smoother time at transitioning and experience the least amount of regression of skills throughout the summer months. Social skills groups, camps, and activities where our children can experience successes lead to better social, academic, and behavioral development.

Dr. Eric Nach, Ph.D., M.Ed., A.S.D. Cert. Developmental and Behavioral Specialist and Associates

Info@SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com    www.SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com

Essential Soft Skills For A Sales Force

Soft skills are crucial attributes required for continued success in the workplace. They are those little nuggets of communication and interpersonal skills that will have you relate better with the people at work. Soft skills are especially essential if your job entails any sort of sales and marketing. Having such interpersonal skills greatly determines how you identify, and deal, with customers. They are, at the very least, one of the reasons you will either be a success or a flop.

When putting together a sales force, there are different factors to consider and different skills to evaluate. However, there are 5 soft skills that are a must-have for any sales force to succeed.

  1. Communication

If you are in sales, the most necessary skill set has to be good communication. The ability to put your ideas across in a clear and concise manner cannot be understated. Whether spoken, written, or through social media, good communication is key. The sales force has to be able to engage with the customer during various situations. Good communication is especially needed when dealing with a customer in a face to face situation. In such cases, the sales force has to be engaging, purposeful, able to put their point across clearly. There should be no room for ambiguity.

  1. Empathy

Your sales team needs to be able to put themselves in the customer’s shoes. How else will they be able to convince the customer that they need your product or service? Being empathic with the customer makes them feel more comfortable when dealing with you. It makes them feel like you are on their side, which for any sales rep, is half the battle. Empathy also makes you communicate your points across better since you can identify what the client is feeling or what they need.

  1. Humility

To be a good sales rep, you have got to learn how to be humble. The phrases “The customer is always right” or “The customer is king” come into play here. Identifying when to be humble during a sales pitch can help you close easier. Humility as a sales weapon helps the customer connect with you better since they feel like you are human; not just an insufferable sales rep out to fill a quota.

  1. Teamwork

In this day and age, businesses are increasingly focusing on a more team-oriented sales force instead of single sales reps. It is, therefore, important that the salesperson is able to operate in a team environment. This includes the ability to work well with others, to offer support to others, to give and receive instructions, and to even ask for help when needed. It’s only by doing so that they are able to perform better and make more sales in a team.

  1. Flexibility

This new move towards a team-based model of putting together a sales force and the unpredictable nature of today’s customer roles requires a lot of flexibility. To be a successful sales team, you have to anticipate situations and act accordingly. They should be able to perform different roles and engage customers on different platforms.

For more information about Dr. Nach’s Online Resources and how to enroll in our online lessons, visit our website at: http://drnachonline.com/

Dr. Eric Nach, Ph.D., M.Ed., A.S.D. Cert. Developmental and Behavioral Specialist and Associates

Info@SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com    www.SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com

The Harm in Helicopter Parenting

Helicopter parenting is a style of parenting where a parent gets overly involved in their child’s life. For such parents, keeping a close eye on every activity of their child is a way of showing them love and ensuring that they turn out well later in life. However, this kind of parenting has been discouraged by experts with a majority advocating for a balance between being protective and allowing children to experience some independence. Even so, some parents still prefer to engage in helicopter parenting resulting in their children facing challenges later in life. Some of the common shortcomings of helicopter parenting include:

Dependence on parents

Majority of helicopter parents do everything for their children regardless of age, resulting in over-dependence. It is common to find mundane tasks such as making their bed or even clearing the table is done by the parents so as to avoid tiring the child. However, these actions tend to make the child lazy and unsure of doing anything without the assistance of their parents – now or in the future. Also, they may feel afraid to attempt anything new without the approval of their parents to avoid disappointing them.

Poor parent-child relationship

Even though parents that get over involved in the life of their children do it out of love, it usually backfires when they face rejection. The main reason for the deterioration of their relationship with their parents is the constant follow-ups and inquiries on their whereabouts which make them feel like their every move is being monitored. Children that feel like they are being constantly watched often harbor ill feelings towards their parents; feelings that can develop into hate over time. In some cases, they start to pull away causing a strain on the relationship that may take years to rebuild.

Inability to express oneself

It is common to find children that have been through helicopter parenting being unable to speak up when confronted with certain situations. They are usually the quiet ones that have to be prodded to give their opinion in a group setting and still have a hard time expressing themselves. If much older, they lack confidence in getting their point across with friends or in office meetings once they begin working. The main cause of their inability to deal with life’s challenges is due to the interference of parents whenever they had to defend themselves.

Lack of analytic skills

The ability to analyze a problem and come up with solutions to tackle it effectively is important for children and adults. However, if they are not allowed to face problems head on and solve them, they will lack a crucial survival skill in life. Unfortunately for children with helicopter parents, this is the norm as most of them have their problems solved on their behalf – thereby denying them the chance to be analytical.

Overall, helicopter parenting does more harm than good for younger children and teenagers. It is better to give them the developmental space they need so that they can grow into better adults that are independent and confident in their abilities.

Dr. Eric Nach, Ph.D., M.Ed., A.S.D. Cert. Developmental and Behavioral Specialist and Associates

Info@SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com    www.SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com

6 Steps to Getting Over Social Anxiety

Social anxiety or social anxiety disorder is named as the third most common mental disorder in the world. It affects millions of people globally. Social anxiety can have far-reaching negative effects on those affected, especially their social life and professional work life. However, social anxiety should not limit your quality of life or serve as a life sentence. You can get over it and lead a normal life by following the following steps.

1. Understanding what social anxiety is and how it works

Social anxiety is the irrational fear of social situations and social interactions. People suffering from social anxiety dread being around other people, especially those they are not familiar with. They also dread being on the spotlight. When in social situations, they suffer anxiety, dread, fear, stress, low self-esteem, and other related mental conditions. Understanding this should be the first step to getting over social anxiety as it will enable you to expect what is to come when in social situations.

2. Understand that other people out there are socially anxious as well

As mentioned earlier, social anxiety is quite prevalent, both in the US and globally. The next step after understanding what the condition entails, therefore, is to also understand that you’re not the only one suffering from it. There are millions more out there going through the same. In fact, whenever you’re feeling anxious in a social situation, remember that there are other people in the same space with you feeling the same, perhaps the very same people you’re feeling anxious about.

3. Telling people about your social anxiety problem

As with any other situation or condition, getting over your social anxiety will require you to tell people about it. This is one important way to cope/manage and doing so has two huge benefits.

One, telling people about it will ease the burden on you. As they say ‘a problem shared is a problem halved’. Two, sharing your situation will enable the people around you to help you cope. For example, they can avoid putting you on the limelight or other actions that will make you feel more intimidated.

4. Don’t focus too much on how people perceive you in public

Another way to get over social anxiety is to avoid over-thinking and over analyzing how other people view you. For one, you’re not perfect and other people around you are not perfect either. Secondly, people around you are not judging you or scrutinizing you. They probably haven’t even noticed you. Thirdly, even when people are focusing on you, it probably isn’t as bad as you think it is inside your head.

5. Boost your self esteem and self image

People suffering from social anxiety often feel inadequate in some way. To counter this, try to boost your self-confidence and your self-image. Dress better, groom better, take a class on how to improve your speaking skills, motivate yourself through books, videos and lessons, make new friends, learn new skills, etc. All this will enable you to feel more confident around people.

6. Seek treatment

Last but not least, seek treatment. Social anxiety can be treated or contained via medication and therapy. Taking anti-depressants is said to help some people. Psychotherapy works even better as it allows people to explain their fears and have hem allayed by a professional therapist. Cognitive behavior therapy is said to work best. It can help change one’s social anxiety for good by altering how one perceives situations around them.

Dr. Eric Nach, Ph.D., M.Ed., A.S.D. Cert. Developmental and Behavioral Specialist and Associates

Info@SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com    www.SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com

Being Confident in a Group Setting

Confidence is an integral tool in human relationships; more so when it comes to interaction with other individuals in a group setting where teamwork is necessary. At Dr. Nach’s Online Resources for Innovative learning, we look into the various ways we can boost the individual’s confidence when it comes to such situations by changing the overall perception they have about themselves.

What causes lack of confidence?

Lack of confidence is caused by the general ignorance of people on issues about society and human behavior. Most times individuals don’t have a proper understanding of themselves or those around them and therefore can’t put their best foot forward in showing how good they are in fear of being judged. Individuals also lack the time and patience to exercise their social skills; skills that could undeniably have a positive impact on their confidence. Past events/experiences that were embarrassing or hurtful also tend to make individuals shy away in fear of a repeat and this makes them hide inside their ‘cocoon’.

What it takes to be confident in a group setting

  1. Self Confidence

An individual has to believe that they are worthy of commanding respect from those surrounding them and that their opinions actually matter and shouldn’t be buried in their mental boxes.

  1. Optimism

When in a group setting, pessimistic thoughts of not being liked or not being viewed as good enough have to be shunned. The first step to doing this is by changing the perception you may have of the group members. Keep an open mind about them and consider them a receptive and understanding audience right from the start.

  1. Preparation

Preparation is of vital importance in boosting self-confidence as one eliminates the fear of having to talk about or perform a task that they are not well versed in. After meticulous preparation, one feels happy and efficient during the group activities as he/ she has the chance to contribute positively to the general activities of the group.

Courses & skills needed

Dr. Nach’s Online Resources for innovative learning offers comprehensive lessons that ensure an overall confidence boost. They include:

  1. Dynamic Group performance
  2. Beneficial Conflict Resolution Skills
  3. Using Creative Problem Solving Strategies
  4. Transitioning into College, High school, and beyond

At Dr. Nach’s Online Resources, you can also find many other lessons that teach you how to improve your interpersonal skills. These skills will further boost your self-confidence and enable you to engage in groups without holding back. Predesigned Course bundles are available or you can build your own bundle based on your particular needs.

Confidence in group settings should be natural for individuals as there is nothing to it besides the overall exchange of ideas and performance of tasks.

For more information about Dr. Nach’s Online Resources and how to enroll in our online lessons, visit our website at: http://drnachonline.com/

Dr. Eric Nach, Ph.D., M.Ed., A.S.D. Cert. Developmental and Behavioral Specialist and Associates

Info@SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com    www.SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com

 

Advice on Saying No to Your Teen

Being a parent is no fun when you have to say no to your child, especially a teen. Teens can be so convincing. Sometimes your son or daughter may act so mature or claim that you don’t trust her/him when you say no. It takes energy to stand your ground and make decisions as a parent. Below are a few things you’ll need to remember about saying no to your teen:

Anger

Teens often use anger to manipulate their parents into accepting or doing whatever it is they want. Your son may curse you, yell or even try to throw things at you. Most parents will give in to the teen’s whims at this point. This means that the child has gotten his/her way. As a parent, you need to be aware of these situations where your child uses anger to get things happening their way.

Unhappiness

Another common reaction when you say no to your teen is unhappiness and disappointment. Your teen will lock herself in the room, avoid you and sulk all day. It’s normal to feel guilty as a parent especially when you see your child unhappy. This is usually a good strategy to get you to change your mind.

Too good to be true

There is that child who will be unusually nice in order to get their way. This could mean helping to clean the house, take out the trash or other tasks that would have been a problem for them to do. Before you know it, she asks you for something that you would have otherwise refused. This tactic usually works because parents will consider it a reward to get her to do whatever she wants. Furthermore, you may not want to mess up the good vibes and positive energy by saying no.

Set very clear boundaries

It is common for your teen to try and push you into making a decision before you even have all the details about what she/he is requesting. Don’t make a decision before you think it through. Take your time to process the information. If you had already established guidelines and rules, think of what she/he is requesting and whether this will go against them. Most importantly, trust your instincts and don’t be afraid to change your decision if you feel it is going to protect them.

Don’t react to drama

If you have teens, especially girls, be prepared for some drama. Don’t let drama make you give in to whatever your teenager wants. Look for a way to stay clear of the drama. If she is really upset, take a break and only talk to her when she has calmed down.

Provide alternatives that would make you say yes

At the end of the day, you don’t want to ruin your teen’s life by saying no to everything he/she wants. You can provide ultimatums or conditions for you to say yes. For instance, ask if a parent will be there for her to go to the party or tell her to give the parent’s number if she is to be allowed to go.

For more information about Dr. Nach’s Online Resources and how to enroll, visit our website at:  https://drnachonline.com

Dr. Eric Nach, Ph.D., M.Ed., A.S.D. Cert. Developmental and Behavioral Specialist and Associates

Info@SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com    www.SupportForStudentsGrowthCenter.com